Work In Colour - Work. Think. Live. In Colour
Sunday 31st July 2011 | 6 comments
I have just done a 4 day training with the Institute of Human Excellence, led by Sir John Whitmore and Niran Jiang. Brilliant stuff.
I have left with plenty of ideas to implement in my workshops and coaching programs. One exercise we spent quite some time working with was in an area I used to use a lot, but have let slide to the background in the last few years. It was about the different parts of us - you could call them inner selves, or sub-personalities, or even names like 'the martyr' or 'the joker' or 'the responsible one'.
One of the selves that I do work with a great deal (both personally and professionally!) is the inner critic, that little voice that pops up in your mind with criticisms or dire warnings such as "If you try that, you will fail", "Everyone will laugh", "You're not creative" or even "Don't be ridiculous". I have written before about this...
Most of us have got to know our inner critics at least to some extent, but there are many more 'selves' living inside each of us...
We all operate more out of some parts of ourselves than other parts. We learn this very early ('Mummy is happy when I smile...', 'Teacher doesn't like it when I am loud...'). Some of us develop the 'pleaser personality' as a result, and the more 'selfish' parts get pushed aside. Others may bring out their inner rebel, as in 'Why should I do what you want anyway - just try and make me!'
It takes different forms in each of us, but in general we all learn very early how to bring forward some bits and push back others (or only bring them out when with trusted friends). This is not all good or all bad, but the more we are aware of the different selves inside of us, the more we can choose to draw on them when it's useful, and have them move into the background when not. For example, some parts of our personalities may be a great asset at a party but not at work.
Try this:
Here's a list of inner selves - see if you can identify with any of them. What would it be like to let them out to play occasionally? Are there situations when they do come out and other times when they take a back seat? What do they contribute to your life? How do they limit you?
Who's in your cast of characters?
So true, you take on different persona's for different situations. Having a discussion with a friend the other day how even when you are middle aged you still jump to your parents call, still do not want to disappoint them, being Mummy' angel.
Robyn, thank you. I agree that how we are when we are with our family of origin can be quite telling. I sometimes think the friends of my adult years see a very different 'me' than my close family!
I love working with all the different inner voices and it's excellent stuff to bring into videos - one can create a whole cast with only one actor by finding these different voices!!
Love the video idea, Claire. Good stuff!
I can identify with a few on the list, Joanna! ... who am I kidding, I'm sure all of them have hung around at some stage.
I can only imagine how the good the training was. I did go to the ICF presentation where Sir John spoke... impressive and very generous with his knowledge!
Sally, the training was most excellent. He is as you say both wise and generous - and has a great sense of humour...